So I joined Facebook about a month ago and didn't think it was all that exciting. The only people that I knew that were on it were from work, and I see and talk to them everyday, so seeing them online was not super exciting (don't get me wrong I love all my friends at work, but I do see them everyday). Well, two days ago an old friend, Gabby, from University found me. This was my bestfriends for four years. We did everything together, she lived with me and we travelled to England together...one prof used to asked where the umbilical cord was that connected us. Well, something happened that strained and eventually ended the friendship...looking back I feel this huge amount of regret that I let that happen. I feel this emptiness.
And over the past 48 hours since reconnecting with her there have been other faces popping up..Heidi..Jennifer..Lori...Diane....all these people who where huge parts of my life and then things happened and they were no longer there.
I look over their profiles and I see all these things that I missed..marriages...babies... and feel this huge pang in my heart that I should have tried harder to be a better friend, I shouldn't have let things go the way they did. I miss them..I miss the time with them......I miss who I was with them.
And now as I plan for the most important day of my life I realize that they won't be there...... somehow that to me feels strange.... I have this huge feeling of regret right now. These were people who were my best friends and I let them go and I don't know why. I'm sure I did something wrong..I can't even remember what caused things to go the way they did.....
Regardless I hope that this has opened the doors again to allow them to let me back in their lives and rebuild friendships that should never have been lost in the first place....
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